The following is a list of things I see on Facebook that are funny, irritating, or just plain sad. This is not meant to offend anyone, although it probably will, seeing as many of my friends are “guilty” of such appalling behaviors (gasp!). But don’t worry, I still love you, and will continue to love you, even if you keep committing the following Facebook “offenses”:
*”Instagram”ing inanimate objects, especially cleaning products. They may look better in vintage style, but do we really care?
*Taking pictures of your food. I take pictures of a great many things, but so far I haven’t photographed my dinner right before I eat it. Some people do it so often that it’s almost a ritual, like praying before every meal. Although I had one friend take a picture of his food after he had eaten half of it. It looked REALLY appetizing at that point. But maybe if we Instagram it, it will look more appealing!
*Tagging people as being there who aren’t, because you just want them to see your post. Not a big deal, I just think it misuses the tagging feature and I just find that funny.
*”Vaguebooking”. OK, I’m as guilty of this as the next person, and I used to think that people who couldn’t handle other people being vague were just being difficult. But my curiosity is starting to get the better of me. If I have to ask, “What happened?!” one more time without getting a response, I will… well…be vague back…maybe.
*Complaining that everybody knows your business, or asking everybody to keep something a secret, when you just announced it on Facebook. It’s a public forum, people. And friends talk. Only share what you want the world to know. For example, I would never share that I am pregnant with twins. Oops! Just kidding, I’m really not…maybe…
Just Plain Sad
*”Sharing” stories about babies born with birth defects who will either get a free surgery if the picture gets 1,000 “shares”, or will get a dollar from Facebook for every “like” on the picture. I don’t know who makes this stuff up, but people inevitably fall for it. I’m so sorry for my poor naive friends who pass this stuff on, but it makes sense: who wants to be the person who doesn’t “like” or “share” the heart-wrenching story about the poor baby born with his heart on the outside? In all reality, if Faceook was going to donate money, wouldn’t they do it despite the number of “likes” a picture gets? I would hope so anyway. And spreading around pictures of these poor babies is really just so sad.
*Being mean. Yeah, just don’t. I don’t care if you are my friend or my friend’s friend. Don’t be mean, even if the debate gets heated or people are annoying you. Even if they commit the ultimate Facebook crime: like taking pictures of their food. Just kidding…really…maybe… But seriously, let’s all show a little courtesy and not say or do anything mean on Facebook. Like not posting blog posts about how annoying everyone else’s Facebook habits are.