Never Enough Friends

I don’t think you can ever know someone too well.  If they are good people then the better you know them, the more you can enjoy them.  If they are sucky people, then the better you know them, the better you can avoid their suckiness.  And most of the times that I have disliked someone, I have learned to like them by getting to know them better.  People who seem snobby may just be shy.  Those who are abrasive at first may have a soft side.  You could miss out on getting to know some great people by not giving them a chance.  And upon closer inspection, people who seem to have infuriatingly perfect lives, don’t.

I often wish I knew people better and that they knew me better.  Maybe that’s why I blog, so people can get to know me.  It always makes me happy to make new friends and have people who actually seem to enjoy my company and invite me to do things with them.  The more you know someone, assuming they fall into the “good people” category, then the closer you will be.  And closeness is a great thing to have.  Close friends can lift you up when you are down, and when you are already up they can lift you even higher.  It’s even good to get to know people who are annoying because the better you get to know them, the better you will be able to appreciate their positive attributes.  And hey, if they bug you, you can always avoid them.  It’s never a negative thing to have a friend, again, as long as they are the lifting-up type.  If they are the type of person that always complains or brings you down, then they’re not worthy of being a close friend.  They are a burden, and it’s OK to take good care of yourself and try not to be around that person.

On a similar note, I don’t think one can ever have too many friends.  In fact, you can never have ENOUGH friends.  I’m not saying that you should be friends with anybody and everybody.  But if someone is enjoyable to be around and the feeling is mutual, why would you want to limit that?  Are you going to say, “No, I’m sorry, I can only have X number of friends and you didn’t make the cut, no matter how much I like you”?  The more friends you have the more enjoyment you can get out of life.  If one friend is busy, another friend may be available for a chat or a get together.  And having mutual friends is a bonus because you can get together and have a party!  Even if you are the type of person who likes privacy and alone time, it’s still nice to have friends that honor that, but are still there for you when you need them.

I wish I had more close friends.  Not because I lack friends or don’t like the ones that I have, but because I can always use more people to help build me up and help me feel closeness.  I can understand people being hesitant to make new friends, you always run the risk that your newfound friend will turn out to be a jerk and end up hurting you.  But out of all the friends you make, the majority of them will be decent people and the few who make it to “close friend” status make it worth the risk.

My closest friends are people who love me even though I’m not perfect, still like me when we don’t agree, forgive me when I’m in the wrong, and appreciate what I have to offer.  And that’s worth enduring the times I’ve had friends who’ve disappointed me.  Don’t ever underestimate the power of friendship.  It can be one of the most important things in your life.

 

0 thoughts on “Never Enough Friends

  1. Dude. You gave me the chills Crystal!!! So does this mean I make the cut? I want to be your friend! ;D (Hahaha it had to be said!)

    Everything you said here about friends resonated with me, very deeply. I could instantly think of “good people” and “bad people” in my life, and thought (with some satisfaction, I might add) about how I have learned to put those boundaries in place. I am still learning but it is SO much easier now that I have the confidence that comes with seeing earlier efforts come to fruition.

    (Haha does that make sense? Sometimes I sound like a meandering wannabe college professor. I don’t mean to, I just get all my “smarter” thoughts mixed up with all my jumbled and not-so-smart ones! LOL)

    Thank you for this, I am sharing this one too! I swear you can read my mind! Love it. And just FYI? 🙂 I promise to stay one of the “good” ones forever. You can count on that. I’m here for ya baby! ;D Love and hugs

    ~E

  2. Dude. You gave me the chills Crystal!!! So does this mean I make the cut? I want to be your friend! ;D (Hahaha it had to be said!)

    Everything you said here about friends resonated with me, very deeply. I could instantly think of “good people” and “bad people” in my life, and thought (with some satisfaction, I might add) about how I have learned to put those boundaries in place. I am still learning but it is SO much easier now that I have the confidence that comes with seeing earlier efforts come to fruition.

    (Haha does that make sense? Sometimes I sound like a meandering wannabe college professor. I don’t mean to, I just get all my “smarter” thoughts mixed up with all my jumbled and not-so-smart ones! LOL)

    Thank you for this, I am sharing this one too! I swear you can read my mind! Love it. And just FYI? 🙂 I promise to stay one of the “good” ones forever. You can count on that. I’m here for ya baby! ;D Love and hugs

    ~E

  3. you blow me away Crystal. Good thinking, I hope Millie reads this because I gave her the opposite thought. I said, you can only have one or two really good friends because when you have more than that the others get mad or jealous that yu are not there for them. This sounds like much better advice.

  4. you blow me away Crystal. Good thinking, I hope Millie reads this because I gave her the opposite thought. I said, you can only have one or two really good friends because when you have more than that the others get mad or jealous that yu are not there for them. This sounds like much better advice.

  5. i agree with what you said, but for me the problem is having the energy to build and cultivate new friendships. Everyday I think I should call so and so over to hang out; i really like her and want to get to know her better and want her as a friend. But, then that requires taking a shower before 2pm and getting out of my pajamas and putting a bra on and maybe doing the dishes. Or if we would rather meet somewhere then I have not only myself to de-pj but the kids as well and this person is probably too busy with the productive life they’re living anyway that i would most likely just be inconveniencing them. So, better just to stay in my pjs and say hi to them on Sunday in my most friendly voice and hope that they realize how cool I think they are and maybe they’ll call me :o) I suppose that I need to get over this, but that takes so…much….energy! Thank goodness I made some long lasting friends in college when I was abounding with energy and hank goodness for family who are great built in firends.

    1. I totally know how you feel, i think that’s why I don’t have more close friends. I’m not a caller, e-mailer, and heaven forbid, a letter writer. My friends out of state I can’t afford to visit, and yeah, inviting someone over takes work. You have to clean the house before they come, and if they have kids, you have to clean the house again when they leave. But I really think it’s a good idea to at least TRY. I think it can be very worth it in the end, but like you said, there are times and seasons for everything. You already have good friends who can be there for you when you are tired and don’t want to make any extra effort. Besides, you just had a baby, girlfriend! I think you should invite those people you think are cool over, but you don’t have to do it now while you are exhausted. Or you could have the whole family over on a Sunday when Jon is there to help you with everything. THis totally sounds like an advice column. Sorry. But since you’re my family/friend, I know you won’t hate me for giving you possibly unwanted advice! 😉

  6. i agree with what you said, but for me the problem is having the energy to build and cultivate new friendships. Everyday I think I should call so and so over to hang out; i really like her and want to get to know her better and want her as a friend. But, then that requires taking a shower before 2pm and getting out of my pajamas and putting a bra on and maybe doing the dishes. Or if we would rather meet somewhere then I have not only myself to de-pj but the kids as well and this person is probably too busy with the productive life they’re living anyway that i would most likely just be inconveniencing them. So, better just to stay in my pjs and say hi to them on Sunday in my most friendly voice and hope that they realize how cool I think they are and maybe they’ll call me :o) I suppose that I need to get over this, but that takes so…much….energy! Thank goodness I made some long lasting friends in college when I was abounding with energy and hank goodness for family who are great built in firends.

    1. I totally know how you feel, i think that’s why I don’t have more close friends. I’m not a caller, e-mailer, and heaven forbid, a letter writer. My friends out of state I can’t afford to visit, and yeah, inviting someone over takes work. You have to clean the house before they come, and if they have kids, you have to clean the house again when they leave. But I really think it’s a good idea to at least TRY. I think it can be very worth it in the end, but like you said, there are times and seasons for everything. You already have good friends who can be there for you when you are tired and don’t want to make any extra effort. Besides, you just had a baby, girlfriend! I think you should invite those people you think are cool over, but you don’t have to do it now while you are exhausted. Or you could have the whole family over on a Sunday when Jon is there to help you with everything. THis totally sounds like an advice column. Sorry. But since you’re my family/friend, I know you won’t hate me for giving you possibly unwanted advice! 😉

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