Lazy Elsie Marley


“Elsie Marley has grown so fine, she won’t get up to feed the swine, but lies in bed ’til eight or nine, lazy Elsie Marley.”

-nursery rhyme

I don’t have swine, but I do have kids and for the record, I do feed them.  But I am really lazy.  If I have the choice between sleep and anything else I will always choose sleep.  If I have slept way too much or my husband is home and awake (which makes me feel guilty for being asleep) then I will choose reading/movie-watching/Facebooking.

Day before yesterday:

Woke up, got the girls food (the boys can fend for themselves), put on a movie for them, fell asleep on the couch, woke up, made them lunch, put them down for a nap and took another nap myself until 5.   Went back to bed at around 10.


Same as the previous day except I took a shorter second nap.


Took the first nap but while the girls took a nap I actually was semi-productive and did some clothes mending.  And now I’m blogging. I will make dinner after this and then go for a run (about the only kind of activity I like).  That’s about as productive as I get, unless I’ve either had a lot of caffeine, something is desperate to get done (like it actually hurts to walk on the carpet), or my husband is hanging out at home (his idea of “hanging out at home” is vacuuming out the cars and cleaning cobwebs off the roof).

In my defense,  some of my kids are sick and so I can’t go to the gym and I sure as HECK am not running on the treadmill here at home, so I have no reason to get my butt off the couch.  OK, that’s not a defense.  It just shows you how truly lazy I am if I won’t move unless I’m going to burn fat by moving.  There IS no other reason to move.  I’m very all or nothing.  I’m usually either comatose or running.  Even on the off-chance that I decide to be productive I have to do it FAST.  The faster I move, the faster I can get back to NOT moving.

I know people who are quite the opposite of me in this way: they hardly ever nap, wake up early and always “have to be busy”.  I am so jealous of these people.  Does it come naturally to them to be so productive?  Or are they naturally lazy like me and have overcome it?  How do I become one of these people?  I would say the answer was Speed if I didn’t know for a fact that these certain friends of mine are NOT doing drugs.  So as a naturally lazy, non drug-taking, non coffee-drinker (it takes a lot of Diet Coke to get me cleaning my house) is there any hope for me?

0 thoughts on “Lazy Elsie Marley

  1. Aahhhh!!! Crystal I LOVE this! Seriously? Woohooooo! Finally, finally. Someone else who’s riding the same wave as I am. Metabolically, at the very least.

    I literally, JUST got back RIGHT NOW from a ridiculously brutal (though relatively flat compared to our lovely CA mtns!) bike ride (the kind where you’re dragging your 40-lb child behind you in the bike trailer and yelling answers over your shoulder over and over, in response to his never-ending and smart-aleky Q&A session.) Pheh!


    I am now lying here sideways across our still-made bed (because Doug made it this afternoon before leaving for work) reading your new post from my phone, wondering if I should get up to brush my teeth… and Weston’s haha… before my eyes shut for the night.


    And before tonight’s ridiculously brutal ride? I was lying here. Wessee has watched so much Power Rangers that he even karate chops in his sleep.

    And am I alarmed? Not really, I tell myself. I find it endearing.

    And when he starts karate chopping / kicking poor Squanto the dog? I make him lie down, too. And I bribe him to go to bed early w/me, since Daddy works til 9:30, Wes can sleep in my bed… if he goes to sleep NOW. ;p

    1. sooo glad I’m not the only one. hahaha! I just got back from a grueling run, twice around the lake, and now I will watch TV/read until I fall asleep. Yup, cycle starts all over again.


Gift Center