Getting medication refilled is a nightmare. It’s bad enough that I have an anxiety disorder, but when the process of getting medicine is almost as bad as the anxiety itself, it’s enough to make one certifiably insane. I just want to get in, get my meds, and get out of there before somebody gets hurt. But alas, it is written in the stars (Pluto being in Capricorn or whatever) that the day I choose to bring my 4 children with me to the pharmacy everything has to go wrong.
I realized a little late that I was almost out of one of my medications. Since I needed it today and I’m only allowed to order refills for the NEXT day, I drove “down the hill” to the pharmacy (If you want to know why this took me an hour you can read my post, The top 10 ways you know you live in the mountains) to place the order in person. The boys behaved beautifully, thank goodness, and were extremely helpful, but for some reason the girls were as hyper as I have ever seen them (probably because Neptune is in the 3rd house). They were running laps around the lines of people while big brothers tried to corral them into chairs. Then they were hopping from chair to chair, falling into each other and screeching, eventually bumping into an old man. I was actually relieved when the girls were making imaginary snow angels (dirt angels?) on the floor because at least they were in one place and playing quietly.
That didn’t last long, though and I ended up putting them in time-out for telling potty jokes, but they just kept sliding down off their time-out chairs. I threatened them with “No soda when we go to Burger King” and that kept them in place. But after time-out they were back to running rampant. Finally I grabbed Princess, forced her to the ground and threatened her again with no soda. Maybe I should have done that from the beginning because it actually worked. But I wouldn’t have wanted to bring out the “big guns” too early. I had to have something to hold over their heads in case the soda thing didn’t work and they ended up behaving even worse.
Despite my efforts, my apologies, and my “nice” face, it was obvious that the people at the pharmacy were (almost) as sick of my kids as I was. It wasn’t just that I was FEELING like everyone was staring at me, or that they would stare and then look away. No, these people were absolutely, unabashedly staring at us. It was worse than the time it was just 5 kids and I at IN-N-OUT and Preemie sat on the floor screeeeeeaming her head off for a full 10 minutes. I alternated doting on her, ignoring her, scowling at her, and finally just laughing at her. The only person who said anything that night was a little girl who announced to everyone when the crying was finally over. But today this older dude kept making comments that I didn’t even know how to take. When I created a barrier between the girls and the really old man they had bumped into, Dude said, “Oh, that was nice of you.” Is that sarcasm? I’m doing my best over here, bub, would you like to help me?” And then later he says, “They’re just like boys!” while the girls are bumping into each other and laughing their heads off. Really? Only boys act crazy? In your day was it unseemly for a little girl to play around?
By now we were at the counter and of course there was a problem with my medication (like I said, Uranus in the 12th house). I had to fill out a form for one thing and wait on approval for another while my phone was ringing, and the girls were sitting at my feet yelling/crying/laughing. Then the lady behind the counter starts up with, “Are they mad or something?” and as I’m stuttering, “Yeah…no…um…” I’m just thinking, who cares what they are, just give me my meds before someone gets hurt!
We finally got the medication and high-tailed it out of there. I could literally FEEL the sigh of relief as we left the building and I can only imagine what those people were saying about us after we left. I subsequently punished the girls by taking away their special blankies when we got in the car, and telling them over and over again that it was because they had been too crazy at the pharmacy (hardly an effective parenting strategy). The whole drive to Burger King I was pondering on my incompetencies as a mother and how I had failed my children and the whole of humanity by not teaching my kids to act appropriately in public. I felt better when we got there and I saw the kids playing nicely on the slide. Was it just me, or were they actually calmer playing on the equipment than they were at the Pharmacy? It’s amazing what a change of venue can do to a person. Me included.
Luckily I survived the incident with my sanity, if not my dignity, intact. As for my bad parenting, I’ll chalk that up to a momentary blight caused by the moon in the cusp of Virgo…or something.